Working With Disappointment: Leaning Into What Is

I love calendars! I love planning my life in the little boxes a calendar provides. I love paper and pen so an old fashioned Day-planner really gets my juices flowing. Each new year I craft my schedule into my planner and when I am finished... all feels right with the world. I am in control.

So far this year absolutely nothing in my life has worked out as planned. From concerts and travel plans to my work and facilitation schedule.....it has all been wiped clean. It feels as if the Universe has taken her beautiful,cosmic fingers and flicked away most of what I had been counting on for the year.

Not surprisingly, the only thing that feels right is this very moment. And why shouldn't it? This moment is all we have. It's not as if this hasn't always been the case, but lately it feels as if I no longer have a choice in the matter. I have to go with the flow or be knocked down by its ridiculously strong current.

There is one thing that cannot be flicked away with cosmic fingers and that's me. I still have a burning desire to know myself through creativity. I work in my altered book as much as I can and it feels like magic I paint for myself and spend time alone with color and my breath and that is enough. The work feels steady and informative as it drops me into my body. I feel the disappointment and sense of loss that has come up as my plans have dissolved and I paint them. I feel and I paint and I do not get stuck in the muck of it all.

I am learning with even greater depth what it is to go with the flow. My plans are wiped clean and I cannot see yet what will take their place. But I do know that something will happen. Something always happens. Maybe it's that what I thought I could plan isn't at all big enough for what is to come. Or maybe it's just that by not having a plan, life can't possibly go off course - it is just as it should be with room left for delicious surprises!

Internal Guidance - Feeling Into The New Paradigm

I feel like I’ve just finished a very intense and in depth master class. If the course had a title it would probably be something like, “Adapting To The New Paradigm - Reading Your Energy To Know What’s Working” . It’s been a totally immersive, 8 week lesson that started with looking at how much money my husband and I have and allowing the number to freak us the fuck out. So much so, that the only alternative we felt we had was to sell our home. The minute we decided this, it felt unbelievably sad and we both experienced a huge amount of grief around the idea of letting this “family member” go. After we worked through the grief, we set about engaging in a string of contract signing with several companies and individuals who wanted to buy our house. It was excruciating and confusing to watch each deal that we'd make, magically dissolve into big piles of steamy horse excrement. All the while, each step we took was bizarrely out of sync with our normal way of being in the world. O

Creating From The Inside Out

Hello and welcome! I'm Stephanie and I am a Creative Transformation Guide, intuitive artist and writer. I have spent almost 3 decades practicing process art and I am passionate about using the creative process to assist others in finding their own wisdom and power so that they may live a more conscious and connected life, from the inside out. I believe now more than ever as we navigate many global (and personal) paradigm shifts, that our creativity is vital and can be used as a tool to tap into our most authentic/Divine self. Every single one of us is born with a creative spark nestled within. That doesn't mean we will all be artists selling our creations in galleries or writing novels. What is does mean is we ALL have the capability to create. WE ARE CREATORS AND ARE MORE POWERFUL THAN WE KNOW. Something happens when we decide to create just for the sake of creating. Because there is no pressure to make something pretty or have it mean anything, the brain gets busy play

Redbubble Shop

I've just opened a Redbubble shop! This has been something I resisted for a LONG time. But now it feels like this is just what happens next. It feels scary and vulnerable and totally right. A few of the designs are what I would consider channeled in that I didn't have much of a hand it what came out and also, they because they are infused with light, which is totally new for me. And there are some images from my altered books that were all about expressing what I was feeling in the moment. I would love it if you took a few minutes to check it out!

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